Americans are getting lazier by the minute. Good news, though: That means that our cars are getting cooler. You can get a massage, surf the Internet and stock up a mini-fridge – all from the comfort of your driver’s seat. Some things are still missing, though. Here are five things we all wish our cars could do.
1. Cool Your Buns
We have seat warmers for the winter, and they feel absolutely delightful. What about the scorching summer months when you sit down and the leather leaves third degree burns on your poor little legs? It hurts for the next week, you do an excessive amount of complaining and nobody’s happy. Every car needs seat coolers with three temperature settings: “I’m in the 7th Circle”, “I Have a Sweat Mustache” and “It’s Just a Little Stuffy in Here.”
On a similar note, a heating and cooling system for the steering wheel would also be nice. Gripping with your sleeves works fine…until you actually need to start making driving maneuvers.
2. Talk to You
If you say you don’t talk to yourself while you’re driving, you’re lying. The “conversation” can range from a quick burst of “I forgot those files!” to a full-on monologue concerning exactly how a thermos is able to keep things both hot AND cold. (But seriously, how does it do it?) Point is, it’d be nice if you had someone, or something, to answer you.
3. Go Invisible
We all have to go places where we don’t want to be seen. Sometimes it’s the third trip through the Del Taco drive-thru on a lonely Friday night, sometimes it’s to slowly creep behind the bad guys because you are out fighting crime. Regardless of your reason, an invisible option on your car would be pretty cool.
4. Door Ding Deflectors
Your car starts to lose its value as soon as you drive it off the lot. Never mind the fact that you will probably park next to a horrible human being that has no concept of space (or physics) the day after you purchase your it. Enter: door ding.
I’ve named this hypothetical device “Door Ding Reflectors.” Every time ANYONE gets close to opening his/her car door into your car door, a tiny person will run out and punch him/her in the shin. Problem solved.
Do you live in the northwest where it rains 25/7? What if there existed a method for measuring the depth of water? OH WAIT.
Unless your car magically turns into a submarine, you might be better off staying away from the roads. Use your vehicle’s built-in sonar to determine whether or not you’re down for braving the commute to work.
Unfortunately, there are no plans for these features to be added to cars anytime in the near future. In the time being, if you’re in an accident in your normal, not quite as cool car and you need an auto accident attorney in Henderson, call Hunt Law Offices at (702) 450-4868.